Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
