She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
Randomize
