She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I don't think you understand. Its the best fauxhawk you've ever seen. I look like a gay dinosaur.
That's the most beautiful thing I've ever heard. Can I call you littlefoot?
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
There's a Taco Bell quesadilla in my shower caddy right now.
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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