I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
