i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
She called his dick the colossus. I dont give a fuck if shes his wingman, I gotta see this natural wonder
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
