Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Randomize
