She said her name was "party"
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
