i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
I wish they made helmets for livers.
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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