idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
He kissed a someone with a penis
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
