OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I've blown a few things in my day
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
