You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
