i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Randomize
