Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
mom and dad googled us on the weekend. i love the internet less than i did on friday.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
