Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Nothing says I've got my life together like buying a jumbo bottle of 7$ wine in sweat pants on a monday night
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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