i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
At 4 am, making my walk of shame, the hotel security followed me to my car with his flashlight shined directly on me. I felt like either a criminal or like I was about to get raped. Can't a girl sneak out of a hotel room without an actual spotlight on her?!?!?!
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
