Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Playing Cards Against Humanity with my relatives at Christmas while I'm stoned was a bad idea...
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
