"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
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