i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
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