Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
