I can tuck mytits in my pants
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
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