we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
Randomize
