I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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