I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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