at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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