found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
