We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
whose parrot is this?
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Randomize
