that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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