It's Friday. Sex?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Randomize
