I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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