she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
