Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Randomize
