did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
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