Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
