I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
I just went into a strangers house to have a spoonful of sugar to cure my hiccups, wtf is wrong with me
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize
