If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
