well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
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