She said her name was "party"
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I was on top for a full on make out when in dead silence "I'm moaning Myrtle" came from the TV. Moment ruined. I got cock blocked by a fictional ghost
This couple is walking their pig around campus
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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