I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
