Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
