Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
