Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I mean, what's the polite way to say, "sorry but I can't date you cuz I'm sleeping with your boss" ??
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