They should really pass out barf bags in church
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Randomize