And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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