school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Randomize
