Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
