Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
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