I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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