He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm sure you can think of a way to make money.. God didn't give you boobs that awesome to waste them feeding your children..
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
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