i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
