3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
The air taste purple.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
